When I tried to let go of the idea of my body as a unit I did it at the bus station. Everyday for a whole week. My experience of these days: While I started to feel smoother, softer, reaching out combined with a feeling of partly dissolving, at some point anxiety took over my body. Every day. The anxiety was fighting against every possible smoothness and I felt the urge to stop, to change my body position and to isolate. One day I felt the urge to express with my body something that I would describe as an idea of toxic masculinity. I didn't like myself in that moment but I felt I had to do it to survive this waiting at the bus station.

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Did I - when I tried to let go of myself as unit - enter the energy fields of the people around me? What would happen if all of us standing there, waiting would let go of being a unit?